Kankakee Bill Collector Sybil Kibble cannot wait to take her break doubling down on debtors so she can have a snack. Yum!
Meet Madeline “Madwoman” Topolla-Teirant, wife of CRASS Accounting Chief Konrad “Kon Man” Teirant and mother to his kids. Madeline met Konrad while drafting up his real estate deeds to ensure no other multiplexes can come to Kankakee. Human Resources Manager and Chief of Security at a low income housing complex, Madeline has a reputation for … Continue reading She’s A Mad, Mad, Woman
Junk email broker, failing film student and sociopath Pat Splatt ventured to the Kankakee Spam convention with his new email harvest collection, hoping to score some new customers. Sadly, Pat was disapponted.
Barfly, pharmacy owner and wacky inventor Wally Green looks for the magnet to his steel in the want ads since no fine ladies are at the bar to hit on.
Brandon's Imbecile Machines: Owned and operated by Kankakee's own good ol' boy Brandon Dixon, offering free roses for m'ladies. Coming Soon: Crotch Rockets! BRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP!
“Man, I am bored.” Smokey says aloud as she smokes in bed. Smokey has been an unhappy lot, unemployed from her CRASS debt collecting job. Smokey hears a loud pound on the door. She has been expecting a package, so she answers. “Kankakee County Sherriff. Is this Mrs. Ashe?” “Yes. Who dis?” “I am here … Continue reading Smokey Gets Smoked
Local karaoke king, poor Elvis impersonator and narcissist Robbie Hurlbutt was so happy to finally get some people at one of his many gigs. Robbie believes in quantity over quality, or staying "prolific", as Robbie says. Too bad his speedball dealer showed up.
Kankakee student, wannabe filmmaker and socipath Pat Splatt poses for the camera. He sure looks like nice guy, at least he thinks so. What do you think?
“It’s hotter than a boiled owl!” Damien says aloud, as he heads down the stairs to get his mail. “Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. I got my postcards off CBay. I bought over 200 from this guy, one at a time. What a great seller!” A lady across the way gives Damien the side … Continue reading Damien Goes Postal